53 Things Only ’80s Girls Can Understand
The decade that was truly, truly, truly outrageous.
1. The struggle of trying to get your Popple into his ball shape.
To think there was once a time when children could be endlessly amused by a stuffed animal that simply folded into itself.
2. Putting plastic charms on every possible accessory you could get your hands on — and each charm had its own special meaning.
3. The joy of peeling off your Tinkerbell nail polish.
4. You knew being a rock star with a secret identity was the best job ever!
Also, the life lessons Jem taught you:1. It’s OK if your man cheats on you, as long as it’s with your secret alter ego.
2. Sometimes it’s way more fun to be the villain (looking at you, Pizzazz).
3. That anything can be solved by pressing down on your earring and saying, “Showtime, Synergy!”
5. Ornamenting your ‘do with a bevy of colorful day-of-the-week and animal-themed barrettes.
6. The importance of nailing the perfect sideways ponytail.
7. The smell of Electric Youth.
8. How Jake Ryan is still your perfect man.
9. The fun of a new Get in Shape, Girl! workout cassette (and, most importantly, the rockin’ accessories it came with).
You basically just wore that sweatband around the house all day afterward.
10. Snagging each new My Lil’ Pony that came out (and filling up your Paradise Estate with them).
11. Getting a new Cabbage Patch Kid, hanging her birth certificate on the wall, and carrying her around with you everywhere.
12. Thinking Rainbow Brite was the coolest girl EVER, and drawing fashion inspiration from her colorful getups.
13. Knowing that Over Our Heads was the best fictional store to ever exist.
14. Using scrunchies as your favorite statement piece, and owning one in every color and print in existence.
Never. Too. Many.
15. Stationery was cool, but stationery with Poochie was clearly the coolest.
16. How She-Ra was the O.G. bad***.
And rocked some slammin’ boots while she showed everyone who was boss.
17. The sugary deliciousness of these cereals:
18. The squishy, fun companionship of Pound Puppies.
19. Organizing all your cosmetics, bath products, and jewelry in a Caboodle (which in itself was sort of the reason to buy tons of stuff to put inside it).
Compartments: SO FUN.
20. How you NEEDED a Swatch watch to match every outfit.
21. These batons with glitter and mysterious fluid inside.
…which you used to play pretend cheerleader or princess or just twirl around when you were bored.
22. The pure magic of the acid trip for kids that was Lisa Frank.
23. Watching these over and over again:
24. The simple thrill of the smell of your eraser collection.
Half of them barely even worked, but they were cute.
25. You went through, like, one Sweet Valley High book a day.
Even though Jessica was too much of a bitch and Elizabeth too much of a Goody Two-shoes for you to really relate to either of them.
26. When you felt like Minnie Mouse was finally on your wavelength on the Totally Minnie album.
27. The delicious smell of Rose Petal and Strawberry Shortcake dolls:
28. The only Degrassi you remember didn’t star Drake.
29. Making something in your Easy-Bake Oven was your favorite way to spend a Friday night.
30. Sleeping with your Glo Worm — and getting creeped out by that softly glowing face staring straight through you in the middle of the night.
31. You remember a young Alanis Morissette on You Can’t Do That on Television (and the show kinda creeped you out a little bit but you couldn’t stop watching).
32. The unrivaled style icon that was Denise Huxtable.
33. Wanting to paint your room like Punky Brewster’s.
34. And totally wanting that badass sofa chair from My Two Dads.
35. The horrible smell jelly bracelets left after you wore them all day…
36. …but knowing that these smelled worse:
37. Your Le Clic camera — which, let’s face it, you only bought because it came in awesome colors.
38. Drooling in front of your TV on 21 Jump Street night.
39. L.A. Gear was the only sneaker brand that mattered.
Don’t even get me started on L.A. Lights.
40. You knew someone who had a My Child doll, but you always thought they were too creepy to own.
You can go ahead and stroll that baby as far away from me as possible, thanks.
41. Finding out the answers to your most pressing questions about b**bs (and other stuff you couldn’t talk to your parents about) via “Teen Works” binders.
42. You looked forward to ABC Afterschool Specials and felt sort of edgy watching them.
43. You wanted to be best friends with the girl at camp who had this rad boombox.
It was the best thing to play your Tiffany and Debbie Gibson tapes on.
44. Little People!
It was probably the first dollhouse you ever owned.
45. You picked up a new set of Lip Smackers every single time you went to the drugstore.
Even though you had, like, 10 Dr. Peppers at home already.
46. The joy of transforming these:
47. Selecting a Care Bear that you identified with best.
48. The struggle of trying to keep your T-shirt clip tight.
49. Sitting in your room for hours poring over Teen Beat, SuperTeen, Bop, and Tiger Beat.
And swooning over the Coreys.
50. The excitement of coming home to a letter (or tons of letters) from a penpal is still, to this day, unmatched.
You probably decorated the envelope with Gelly Roll pens and regularly sent each other friendship bracelets.
51. You loved NKOTB and had memorabilia mostly of your favorite one in the group.
Probably Jordan or Joey.